Category: Cancer

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EFT Tapping Tutorial

 

If you follow me, you know what EFT Tapping is. If you don’t, I’ll give you a quick tutorial.  EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), also called, Tapping, was founded by Gary Craig in the 1990s. It is like acupuncture but without the needles. Basically, you use your fingertips on either or both hands and tap on certain energy meridian points (as in acupuncture) to calm down and restore balance of the energy in your body. EFT can help both emotional and physical problems/issues. By tapping while focusing on a specific issue/traumatic event you can calm down the emotions you are carrying, and even release these old patterns that go along with the emotion.

HOW DO I DO THIS EFT?

First, let me tell you where the tapping points are:

  • Karate Chop (Side of hand, fleshy part) (KC)
  • Top of the Head (TOH)
  • Inner Eyebrow (IE)
  • Outer Eye (OE)
  • Under Eye (UE)
  • Under Nose (UN)
  • Under Chin (UC)
  • Under Collarbone (One inch down from collarbone then one inch out on soft tissue) (CB)
  • Under Arm (where bra strap hits) (UA)

First, you think of what is bothering you that you want to tap on. How intense is this feeling/emotion, on a scale of 0-10. Zero being it isn’t intense at all and 10 being VERY intense. Then place your dominant hand over your heart, then the non-dominant hand over. Take 3 deep breaths from the. belly.

Next,  start tapping on the side of your hand, where you would do a karate chop, the soft, fleshy part. You tap with either hand, tapping with your four fingertips, gently, while repeating a “Set-Up Phrase,” which is a short explanation of the issue you want to tap on. For example, you are upset that you got into an argument with your boss and she made you feel like you were incompetent. So, the setup phrase could be something like, “Even though my boss made me feel incompetent during our argument today, I deeply and completely accept myself,” while tapping on the side of your hand. You start with “Even though I have (this issue)…I deeply and completely accept myself.” You will say this 3 times.

Next, you will use the “Reminder Phrase.” This is a shorter version of what is bothering you. Using the above example, you could say, “Boss made me feel incompetent,” or “Feeling incompetent.” Anything that feels right to your words. It is important that you use what feels right to you. So, when you get that, you start at the Inner Eye or on the Top of the Head. You can do either. I tend to start on the inner eye, but do what is comfortable for you. There is no wrong way with Tapping. So, tapping gently on the inner eye (where the eyebrow meets the bridge of your nose) repeat, “Boss made me feel incompetent.” Then to the outer eye, gently tapping, “Boss made me feel incompetent.” Do approximately 7-10 taps, but you don’t have to count. It usually takes at least 7 just to say the Reminder Phrase. Don’t worry, it will still work if you do 5 or 20. Continue down each point, ending at the Top of the Head. Stop and take a breath and check the intensity (your 0-10). Has that intensity number gone down, up, stayed the same? Just feel how it feels. Repeat the problem, such as “Boss made me feel incompetent.” How does it feel? Same intensity. If it did not go down to about a 2 or lower and you have time, do the round again. If your emotions have changed, say that now you feel angry or hurt, you can change the Reminder Phrase to something that feels true to you. For example, “Feeling hurt.” Go through the points saying this reminder phrase. Keep going with the above pattern until you feel like it doesn’t bother you anymore. When you get to a 1 or 0 on the intensity scale.

I will be doing more video’s on this so don’t get frustrated. You can’t do it wrong. You can even just rant what you are feeling and just change points. If you still don’t feel comfortable, pick a point that feels good to you and just rant while tapping that point. Again, you can’t do this wrong. Make sure you keep going back to your intensity.

That is EFT Tapping in a nutshell. It is something to start with. Next, I will do a blog on Tapping for Breast Cancer. You can use Tapping for anything you can think of. Just feel the emotion while you are tapping. That helps that negative energy to release a little easier.

Try tapping and watch for my videos on my FB page “Women’s 50+ Wellness and Self-Care, or go to my website, www.wellfitways.com and join for your free gift and check out all my blogs and programs.

 

 

 

 

 

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Are you just having one of those days…or weeks…or months…?

Have you recently had one of those days (that probably is more like weeks or months…) that you just feel crappy? Like everything is coming down on you and you’re just trying to stay afloat and keep everyone happy, except what you are really doing is making yourself miserable and stressed?

We have all been there and, we all know that it is not fun by any means. It actually, is hell! Why do we, as woman, always feel like everything is up to us to make everything right, even at our expense? Well ladies, I’m here to tell you that this needs to stop! It is not good for our mind, body, or spirit. It brings on stress, which causes illness.

I’m here to tell you that we can change our ways. We just really, really, really have to want to, because, let me tell you, it sounds really easy, but it isn’t always easy to get there. Are you wondering, “what in the hell is this girl talking about?” HaHa! I’ve been there, as well.

It is about knowing what we really want and living it before we even have it. It’s about believing in ourselves and our wants and staying focused on those wants. Keeping our thoughts clean and positive, and not turning negative as soon as someone tells us something we don’t want to do or hear. Yes….it isn’t easy. However, if you want it bad enough, you CAN do it. You can stay focused on your wants and  then start to see things happening in positive ways that lead you to those things you want. To the life you want.

This life that you want is your birthright. We all deserve to be happy, healthy and prosperous. It’s our past beliefs and programs that have hindered us from receiving what it is that we really want. We sabotage ourselves from achieving the our goals and desires. We need to stop and start living the feelings that will help us receive instead of resist.

I have a little exercise for you to do:

1. Write down what it is that you really want in life. For example, a specific lake house that you want. Now, is it the lake house you really want or is it the feelings that this lake house will give you that you are looking for? Hmmmm….take a guess.

It is the feelings that his house will give you that you really want.

2. So, the next step is to sit quietly and close your eyes. Take a couple deep breaths and think about how that house is really going to make you feel. Is it going to make you feel happy, joyous, free, grateful, peaceful, courageous, secure…? Those are just some feelings. What feelings would what you wrote down give you? Write down all those that come to you.

3. Okay. Do you have those 2 steps done? I’ll wait… Now, the homework comes in. Start really feeling those emotions that you wrote down. Think of other things that would help you feel like that, also. Live each day really feeling that joy, gratitude and freedom and think about that thing you wrote down.

4. Start living your life as if you already have it. If you can, take a picture with it or by it. Meditate on this and picture yourself already having what it is you want; be very clear and specific. What are you wearing? Who are you with? How is the weather? Is it bright or dark? What is going on? Just be very specific and see as much as you can.

5. When you find yourself down about something, stop yourself and take a deep breath and get back into those emotions that what you want brings you.

As I said, it’s not that easy, BUT DON’T RUN AWAY…COME BACK! You CAN DO THIS! When somebody says or does something or you have a bad day at work and you just want to be negative and tell them what you really think, or maybe even agree with what they may be saying negatively to you or about you, PLEASE, just stop. In this practice, you must be in control of your thoughts and moods. As Tony Robbins says, “Energy flows where attention goes.” You need to have clarity about what it is you really want. Only then can you start focusing your energy on that and become “obsessive” about it. Then, watch amazing things begin to happen.

All you have to do is be clear on what it is that you want. Write it down. You can even put it on your refrigerator, on your computer, in your car, on your bathroom mirror. Write down what positive emotions having this would make you feel. Go ahead, write down all the emotions.

For more information on my programs, go to www.wellfitways.com.

If you need help with this, join my 1:1 program for a tailored program to fit your needs.

 

EXPECT MIRACLES!

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Breast Cancer and Fitness…

Breast cancer does not have to be the end of living..it may be the beginning!  I have Estrogen-positive breast cancer, that was stage I, grade 3. If I had not gone to get it checked because I felt a huge, finger-like lump in my right breast (that was nothing), I would not have found that I really did have a mass, but not the one I thought was a problem. Life has a way of showing you the way! That day was a blessing and I’m very grateful for it.

The day after I had my first surgery, I was exercising my arm. I had 1-2 lymph nodes removed (one was a lymph node, the other turned out to be fatty tissue). Having worked in the Occupational Therapy field for over 30 years, I knew what I needed to do. Range my arm in every plane so that I wouldn’t get lymphedema and stiffness. Ask your doctor a lot of questions.  Ask when you can start exercising and how much; what, if any contraindications you may have. When you get that information, do what you are told. Don’t go crazy exercising. You don’t want to hurt yourself, you just want to get back into moving your arm and feeling better, following what they are telling you, specifically.

I knew what to do, and I knew the importance of getting back into exercise, also being a Certified Personal Trainer, working with women over 50. There are people who feel they shouldn’t or can’t exercise. Again, check with your doctor, but exercise is so important after breast cancer surgery to get the fluid moving to prevent lymphedema, to keep your range of motion, to feel better, to feel Alive! If you have never been an exerciser and just don’t like it, try Yoga, Tai Chi, anything. It is wonderful for not only your body, but your mind and spirit.

Usually you can start the day after surgery, but again, check with your doctor. If you are not new to fitness, you will probably feel better physically and mentally, and usually will be more motivated to get back into it. Do not do any exercises if you have drains and stitches. Talk with your doctor to get the okay after those are out.

My fitness is mostly intended for women who have had a lumpectomy/partial mastectomy. This is what I had and feel more comfortable talking about. I know what I did and what helped me, personally. Still, get the ok to start. If you ever feel worse, feel pain, or off balance/dizzy, stop immediately. Keep hydrated and start with a chair or counter in front of you. You can even start in a seated position. I will be doing a video on chair exercise to get you started. I did this just to be on the safe side, working my way up as I felt I could.

Range of motion exercises on the surgical side arm will help make dressing, combing your hair and moving around as usual much easier. You will notice a tightness in your arm on the surgical side. You also will feel a numbness, tingling, weird feeling from any lymph node removal. I still have some of the strange feelings you get from the lymph removal, not as bad as I did, but a year-plus out, I still get occasional strange sensations under my arm. If you get nervous about something you feel or are doing, call your doctor or nurse. They will help you and will know your personal situation and give you the best answers.

Let me give you some good, quick exercises you can do to start with. First, check with your doctor!

Deep breathing. Imagine having a balloon in your abdomen. Inhale through your nose and picture that balloon filling up with air. You can keep one hand on your abdomen to make sure your hand is going in and out. When you inhale, you are expanding your abdomen and your hand will move out. Now exhale and picture the balloon contracting and your hand moving back in towards your spine.  If this is difficult for you, lay on your back and bend your knees with your feet flat on the bed or floor. When you lay like this, you automatically start to breathe from your abdomen. It will give you a feel of it.

Do this deep breathing while expanding your chest and abdomen until you can’t inhale any more. Then, relax and breathe out, with your tummy going in towards your spine. Do this about 5 times every day. You will feel great after this. It helps to clear your mind, as well. You can even make a deep sigh sound when you exhale to release any stress.

Another breathing exercise is to follow the instructions above, but when you are inhaling and expanding your abdomen, picture a calming, white light coming in through your whole body, then exhale and picture black toxins and stress leaving your body.

For your upper extremities, if you are having a difficult time lifting the surgical arm, fold your hands together, as in praying. Use the non-surgical arm strength to help life the surgical arm. Lifting both arms up over your head. Stop if it hurts. Go slow and take your time. Make sure you are breathing in through your nose when your arm is going up, then exhale through pursed lips bringing your arm down. I started with about 10 repetitions. Again, follow your doctor’s orders. They usually give you a handout on exercises to do and how many reps. Follow this handout.

So, the first exercise is raising your arms up over your head and down, again, only going as high as you can, and increasing as you can. The second is to bring your hands to your chest and then straight out. You can do this with your hands folded together or not. Do not use weights until allowed. Do this exercise about 10 times.

Then, with hands folded, straight out and chest height, slowly bring both arms to the right side, then to the left. Again, about 10 reps.

Then, bend your elbow, bringing your hand/s to your chin, then straight down towards your lap, doing about 10 reps.

You can also hold onto the back of a sturdy chair and do 10 squats, kick one leg out to the side at a time, then out towards the back. Slowly doing these exercises. If you feel dizzy, stop and sit down. Drink some water, as well. You always want to have water with you when exercising, Stay hydrated.

The last exercise I will give you today is to walk. If you are unable to get outside and take a walk in nice weather, take a couple laps around your kitchen or house. Obviously, outside would be nicer, but do what you can. If you are a little weak, make sure you have someone with you. Don’t take any undo risks. You have been through enough.

You have been blessed, for your body is telling you something. What is that something? Maybe it is to slow down, maybe start taking care of yourself, maybe to let go of past anger, hurt, resentment. The list goes on, however, there is a lesson. Meditate on it, ask questions. This is your blessing…to learn what it is you need to let go of. I’m not saying it is easy. Ohhhh, it isn’t. Parts are, but not all, but it is still a blessing, nonetheless. Learn what your blessing is and go with it. Live your life!

If you are interested in more like this, please check out my Trainerize Fitness Program, at www.trainerize.me/profile/50wellfit/Roberta.StackKalinsky/

EXPECT MIRACLES!!

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You Have Cancer…Now What??

roberta

Those of us who have cancer know that feeling of dread; your heart suddenly just dropping and everything becomes surreal. What happens after that depends on each individual.

You go through a process, a grieving process; because, in fact, you are grieving  a loss. A loss of your health. A loss of the life that you once had. After that, you can say, “I have cancer. That means I am going to die!” or, you can say, “Ok, I have cancer. What is my plan? How do I feel about it? What can I do to make a difference in my life?” I chose the latter and, I hope you do, or have, as well.

I have been doing mind-body work and EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) Tapping for a while, but knew I was still holding a lot of anger and grief in my body from my childhood and first marriage. I honestly have to say that I was not totally surprised when they told me I had breast cancer. What I understood, almost immediately was that holding onto my past was a huge instigator to. my diagnosis that day. I don’t think I ever really though, “Why me?” Because, I really did know Why! I was actually grateful and still am for my cancer. It was my body saying, “Hey, will you take a look at me? Will you listen to what I am trying to tell you?” It was, in fact, telling me a lot!

From there, I felt literally grateful for my diagnosis. It was showing me the way back to health; a way back to the real me and the life that I was born to live. I learned how to listen to my body; to listen to what it was telling me. What it was telling me was to STOP the old programs and beliefs and to start loving myself. To show compassion to myself and to others. To love my life, my body, mind and spirit for what and where it was in that moment. To be happy and grateful for everything I had in that moment. I know it all sounds so crazy and difficult; and, it can be.

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You got this diagnosis, or have had this diagnosis, so now what?? You have options. You have thoughts that you have; maybe negative, maybe positive. You have alternative measures you can take to help decrease pain, fear, anger, overwhelm, anxiety, negativity…

Some of the options I use are: EFT Tapping (also just called plain Tapping; self-awareness exercises, meditation, some yoga, Ho’oponopono, and breathing exercises, practicing mindfulness and gratitude,  among some other mind-body healing exercises. All I can say is I keep this up daily. I found a daily routine that works for me and I do it 1-2 times or more a day. I feel better and stronger mentally, physically and spiritually. I literally love my life, before surgery and now. I try to really live in the moment, being mindful and very grateful for what and who I have in my life, and, for myself. It has all been part of my journey, as well as yours’ is part of your journey.

So, live your life. Accepting your cancer is very important to your healing process. You want to be a fighter, but you don’t want to fight the cancer. You want to love it and listen to what it is telling you/your body. This may be very difficult, but it is possible. Letting go of the anger, pain, fear, etc., will help you do this. So, don’t grieve the life you had prior to your diagnosis. Live this life, it may be even better.

For more information or to work with me 1:1 to start feeling better and living life, click on my website and go to Programs/1:1.

Make your LIFE a GREAT one!